Still You
by wrestlefan4
Summary: Bret Hart/Shawn Michaels. BHBK. OST. Mentions of: Hunter/Shawn Shawter, Shawn/Rebecca.


**A/N: I really don't feel like explaining this whole story step by step but I feel like maybe I need to explain somewhat since I didn't use names. It came to my head like this, and I like it like this. I think it's very meaningful without having to put names all over the place, and maybe even because of that. This whole thing is from the point of view of Shawn Michaels. In the first part, he's with Hunter, but his mind and heart are elsewhere. The middle part is the re-union we saw with Shawn and Bret, and beyond. The 'she' referred to in the last part, is Shawn's wife. I would only say try not to think of each name as you read though, because I think it feels better, and deeper, that way. Last but not least, the lyrics used in here were slightly changed just to fit the male/male part and the tense was slightly changed in the last part. The lyrics are from the song Lips Of An Angel by Hinder. This is an OST only. I am as you read this still working on updates for Coldest End, and Twelve Days of Christmas. So please be patient, I will update them. ~j~  
**

Still You

Scraping the hair off my cheek, I feel it tangle 'round my fingers, and my face ignites again, makes me feel so weak. I know I'm turning red, and not from the love that was just made but from thoughts of you that should by now be dead, if I really didn't love you. Sometimes when I kiss his lips and taste his skin, it makes my eyes leak because the taste against my tongue is bittersweet. No one else has ever tasted the same to me, as you did. Sometimes when I'm near the peak, I can't cry out his name for fear my wanting heart will replace his with yours, so I can only moan and wish it was you entangled in the sheets. It doesn't seem to matter how many years slip between us, how many times the hands on the clock repeat, it's still you I long for when I'm so lonely, and even with him I find it's often that I weep.

I've spent so much time on my knees, praying for a heart I once thought I knew. I've talked to God selfishly, and asked Him to bring me back to you. I knew it was a fools hope, but I've been called much worse. Sometimes I think loneliness is my life's bitter curse.

God we had so much, and we just let ourselves get in the way. I think at night about us, and wonder how things would have been, if one of us would have stayed. Could we have became more than lovers, underneath ones secret mask? Or would we rip each other apart, leaving nothing but ragged scraps? I'd like to think if many situations had been different, or maybe the times had changed, that we could have made it—that it wasn't us to blame—but that's a question with an answer that I believe no one can obtain. The daggers came from our mouths and slit each other apart, the flame of our passion spilled from the same lips, and we broke each others hearts. I don't remember much middle ground, it was always ice or flame. I wonder where it was we tread when we searched for pathways in the dark, and why the daylight never came.

I try to still my rambling thoughts, and dry my dampened eyes. I pull the cottony covers up, trying not to cry. I can't believe how you still get to me, and I don't think it'll ever end. I ask God to grant you peace, but sometimes I don't know if He's my friend. I'm still new to this faith that's saved me, but I'll ask him just the same. Lord, please watch over him, I know that you know his name. It's short and simple, but I don't know what else to say. My biggest sin was hurting you, and it makes me forget how to pray.

I can hear the shower start up, he's left the door ajar as always. I remember a time when it was you, in there under that spray. You forever looked so stunning, dark curls clinging to your face. You always captivated me, with eyes that still make me fall from grace. I close my eyes to try and sleep, as the shower softly hums. Instead I hear your voice, a whisper of my name, and sleep doesn't want to come, to take away my pain.

_Well, my guys in the next room, sometimes I wish he was you._

_I guess we never really moved on._

_It's really good to hear your voice saying my name,_

_It sounds so sweet, coming from the lips of an angel. _

_Hearing those words, it makes me weak._

_And I never wanted to say goodbye._

I must have drifted to sleep, the last sound to sweep through me, was you. He wakes me, shaking your dream from my mind. His hazel eyes look kindly into mine, from beneath his honeyed lashes. He wipes away my tears, but he can't kiss away those years, you and I unwound together and burned to ashes.

"Honey, why are you crying? Is everything okay?"

Not now, but maybe one day it can be. I can't tell him who I dreamt of, he'll never understand why I feel this way. Words escape me, his arms surround me, but all I can do is wish they were yours anyway.

"It's kinda hard to talk right now."

So I leave his warm embrace, go into the bathroom to splash water onto my face.

_Well, my guys in the next room, sometimes I wish he was you._

_I guess we never really moved on._

_And I never wanted to say goodbye._

And now this day has come, it took years for my prayers to reach you, for God to bring you to this place. I know there is no other way, this moment could take place. I hurt you too deeply, your heart was a broken, and mended into rage. I often feared that fire would consume you, and burn you long before your age. Now here you are, in the next room over from this. In a matter of moments we'll be out there together again, so long have I waited for this. I want you to know I forgive, and I hope I too am forgiven. We've been crushed by this burden too long, and it's not the way we should be living. My heart beats faster, stampeding a rapid pace. The world may not know it, but we were lovers in another place.

We mended our broken fences in front of all the world, at last a chance to make it right. But as far as I was concerned, you were the only one there that night. The relief I found when I saw your eyes, no longer hardened into pits of pain, made me cry once we were alone—but the tears were like a new springtime rain. You pulled me close and your lovely lips smiled at me, as best as they could do. To a mirror it might have been less than it once was, before time made one half numb. But to me it was the most beautiful portrait, an artist could never paint. No brush could capture what that moment meant to me, no words known could ever express. I brushed soft strands of graying hair back from your handsome face, and I knew I had always been yours. You cupped my cheek and said to me:

"Shawn, baby why you crying? Is everything okay?"

Closer to you, I manage:

"It's kinda hard to talk right now."

Words escape me, your arms surround me, and I lose myself to your kiss. I'm sure if God has made a heaven, it can't be half as sweet as this.

Your hotel room, I told her we needed to speak. What words we said in breathless moments, will be our treasures left to keep. Scraping the hair off my cheek, I feel it tangle 'round my fingers, and my face ignites again, makes me feel so weak. I know I'm turning red, from the love just made. Sometimes when I kiss your lips it makes my eyes leak, it's bittersweet. No one else ever tastes the same to me, as you do.

I can hear the shower start up, you've left the door ajar as always. I can't help but peek, and watch you standing under the spray. You still look so stunning, silver-brown curls clinging to your face. You always captivate me, with a gaze that will always make me fall from grace. You open your eyes and turn to me, as the shower softly hums. I hear your voice, a whisper of my name.

Shouldn't I be leaving? She's in the room next door and doesn't know. The only problem is, neither of us wants me to go.

_Well, my girls in the next room, sometimes I wish she was you._

_I guess we never really moved on._

_It's really good to hear your voice say my name,_

_It sounds so sweet, coming from the lips of an angel. _

_Hearing those words, it makes me weak._

_And I never want to say goodbye._


End file.
